Do I say anything?


Was out at Ukrainian Christmas at the Andryo's and had a lot of fun, ate tons of food and had some great conversations. A great night indeed.

But an idea that has been itching in my head for a while but was waiting for the insight, or intent to be formed. And it came from David Farran.

He reminded me that while I live with this adventure on a daily basis, others are new to it, and they don't really know how to approach the subject. 

This applies mainly to the people that are not reading the blog.

The people reading these stories are certainly more than comfortable being absolutely direct with questions like "how's the exploding ass these days", or "the junk still messed up?" (darn, where do I put the comma - does the ? go inside or outside the damn quotation marks? This writing this is fraught with so many rules).

Apologies, back to the post. 

In my opinion, showing someone that you are thinking of them, or are interested in their best well being is always the right and safe thing to do. You will quickly learn if they want to proceed based on what the person says or what their body language tells you.

It may seem like a risk to enter into the conversation, but in my opinion you are safer to show love than to ignore the conversation and possibly make them feel like you don't care. 

Some people don't want to talk about it, and they will tell you in their own way. They may have talked about it ad nauseam, or they may just be emotionally unstable and not ready to open the emotional can of worms. There are many reasons why someone would be happy not to discuss it. And when that occurs then change the topic without feeling like a dolt. You did the right thing and now you can carry on with another subject and feel good about it.

And there are just as many reasons why they are happy to discuss their medical issue. They feel good sharing, they want you to know how they feel and where they are physically or emotionally, the appreciate the concern and the attention. They appreciate getting out of their own head as well. They just appreciate the sharing and the caring that comes with talking together.

Either way, and again, this is just my opinion, you can't go wrong by showing compassion or concern for a friend or neighbour. So when in doubt be kind and say hello and gently ask how they are feeling. 

Now, all that being said. Having a blog has made significant changes in how this particular social moment occurs in my day to day adventure. My life is now a wide open book and everyone knows much about my physical and emotional situation. I have a  very very small glimpse into what it feels to be part of the public domain. I see it when I am with Dave Kelly all the time as he is always recognized. Me not so much.

But sometimes funny things happen and we are both recognized at the same time.

I had a great dinner with Dave Pierce and Dave Kelly at Caesars the other night. Gerry, one of the co-owners brings us to our table and upon sitting down he says

"On a drug holiday?"

As the three of us were already in a paranoid mood this question really threw us for a loop. It took a second before we all collectively sighed and realized Gerry was talking about the blog. Not our evenings adventure.

Man, was that funny.

Thanks for asking Gerry, I'm doing just fine these days and I really appreciate you asking and chatting about it briefly.

And that steak was the best I've had in my life. Thank you.



Groundhog Drug

Drug holiday is over