Shit Went Sideways


My last two posts haven't really given you an indication of where the fever came from and why I am still in the hospital or even why I came here in the first place.

And to be really honest, now that I am celebrating my second week of being in here today, I am still trying to piece it all together.

As we know I came to the hospital for my Nivo treatment but was quickly shipped down to emerg due to a fever.  

As it turns out the fever was the insight into the fact I had cholangitis which then turned into sepsis.  I just googled them both. I'm lucky to be alive.

I didn't fully appreciate the severity of my situation until some point on the Saturday or Sunday (whole weekend is a complete blur due to heavy medication) when I woke up to a sea of people in my room. 

My bother Dave flew back from China, Pat flew out from Waterloo, I think Hal and Connie came from Ottawa or Belize (again confusing times) and my in laws Geoff and Shirl were up from Fernie. Kyle, Ryan and Jil, I think four of Tracey's girlfriends and of course Tracey were all in the room. If there were others I apologize for missing you.

My brother Pat was beside me and I asked him 'why are all these people here?' He didn't have an answer and it was at that point that I knew shit had gone sideways. 

It was the proverbial emergency assembly of people to your bedside for their last chance to visit. 

Since that day the medical team at the Foothills, Tom Baker and Peter Lougheed have done wonders and have gotten me to the point where I may be able to breathe fresh air again and feel the warmth of the sun on my face.

And for that I am forever grateful. 

Along the way there have been four surgical procedures, I've had multiple misadventures with my Johnston and had a catheter (cool kids call it a foley) attached to me for 10 days, been hooked up to a pole with broad spectrum antibiotics, saline solutions and of course morphine.

I've had my dances with pain medications ranging from simple Tylenol and an ice pack to fentanyl, hydro-morphine, morphine and ativan. 

I had a full blood transfusion- so weird watching other people's blood entering your body. 

I got the 'lady disease' in my mouth and have had a lovely rinse four times a day to try and get rid of the thrush. Oh, sorry, I call my thrush lady disease cause it's basically a yeast infection caused by the non-stop antibiotics. 

For 10 days I have had a bile drain  (known as a billy by the cool kids) extending out from my ribs. Fuck that hurt. Thankfully I just got out of the surgery to have it removed and the Doctor doing the procedure really gave me comfort as we discussed my options.

Odds are pretty good I'm now having operations for both bile and pancreas on a monthly basis going forward.

So much science! 

I feel endless gratitude and frankly it's almost impossible to express how much of it I have swelling up in my body. The amount of love and support given to me and Tracey by friends and family has been overwhelming and can never be repaid. Houman my medical sherpa has been an endless source of knowledge and guidance and I am truly indebted to his overly complex brain.

The visits, the silly gifts, the meals snuck in, the online chatter have all played a part in my journey and I appreciated it all. Truly.

Most of all I appreciate how challenging this has been on my family, especially Tracey. That part kinda crushes me cause I know it is incredibly stressful to be the main caregiver.

Like really crushes me. It's almost the number one motivation to stay healthy and out of the hospital.

So I will do my best to get better and better cause I love her too much to keep doing this to her.


PS just after I googled Sepsis Medium put this into my feed. Damn alogorithms really know how to keep you online.



Mondo Catheter Barganza