Drug Induced Comedy

I learned a lesson about social media and drugs yesterday. I was shown this video Tracey took of me while I was just coming out of my stupor after surgery. And the first thing I did was laugh, second thing I did was post on Instagram cause I found myself so cute. And I like it when people make fun of me so I thought this was perfect!

Then I put the phone away and forgot all about it, only to find many texts and emails wondering what had happened and 'why was I in surgery?'

So, ummm, first of all sorry for needlessly scaring anyone. And secondly below is the story of why I was so dopey.

As you know in my recent post I have been having a few challenges with the tumour that has grown on my pancreas. A month ago we had a stent put in that was supposed to relieve the pain and allow the pancreatic enzymes to do their job. Unfortunately the original stent migrated and was no longer transversal of the stricture (fancy doc talk for the stent didn't remain as a bridge to get through the tumour). And this caused me some serious pain.

Actually for the last two weeks I have had some class 8 pains in my abdomen.  Actually had to leave an Evans Hunt meeting early as the pain was unbearable.

Drove home, met Tracey at the door. Dropped everything and jumped in to the bath to meditate and calm down. Tracey was actually guiding me through this as I was outside myself and super tense which wasn't helping with pain management. We saw the doctor, got some blood tests taken and were sent home to relax as in Dr. R's words "a hospital isn't a good place for sick people'. 

I was then given an appointment for an ERCP (endoscopic retrograde cholangiopancreatography) to have a look at the stent and see why my lipase was back up to 1,200.

The best thing Dr. R did for me was to send me home to rest. No food for three days, but I was able to get a great couple of nights sleep and had to go into the Foothills for IV hydration - 2 litres to top me up as I wasn't ingesting anything. 

I now have a longer stent (in black ink below) that will allow the pancreatic enzymes to do their work and help in digestion.  This diagram was drawn for me in the hospital. Tracey showed them to me today as I didn't remember it at all. 

Which as an aside is yet another moment to give thanks to my lovely wife. She is not only there for me, always, but she comes from a medical family and was able to explain all parts and process to me. Stomach to duodenum to pancreas. Stricture is the tumour and where the blockage occurred. Longer stent by-passes the tumour and allows enzymes to find their path.

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I am comfortably back at home and am super happy. The pain is almost gone and I am eating like a horse, or a pig. Not sure which eats more...but I have a lot of weight to put back on as I am looking like I am a Grade 9 wrestler again.

Sorry for causing stress folks. I'm better and better today as last night MBF and I ate a lot of cookies.

PS I had to give myself a suppository yesterday, it aids in ensuring I don't get pancreatitis again. Nurse hands it to me, we make obligatory jokes and I head off to the bathroom. Pull down pants, attempt entry, feels like it goes in. 

Nope, I stood up and the damn thing shot out on to the floor.

For a second I stared at it, then looked at the door, then back at the suppository.

Do I pick it up?

Do I have to go out the door and admit defeat?

If not for the vision of Tracey giving me hell for picking it up and putting it back in I would have done so. Instead I opened the door, walked out to the hallway with pants at my knees and asked for another one.  As you can imagine the scene was not the cool Fashion Santa in a gown that I was attempting to project. Instead the jokes were amplified and I was sent back in to attempt second entry of the bullet. 


And for those that have to do it, the secret is to keep your finger in place till you stand up. It's like a pressure valve.

Words of wisdom from Foolish Santa.

Now let the fun making begin. 

Age of Indulgence

Old Man Winter